Letters to a daughter from her parents, starting from before she was born

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

15 week journal

Hey baby,
How ya doing in there? I think you're probably growing something important since I was nauseous this past week, and now I'm so tired it's all I can do sit upright.  Keep growing!

How Far Along: 15 weeks, 3 days

Size of baby: Naval Orange, at 4 inches and 2.5 oz.

Gender: We find out in less than a month

Movement:  It's moving, but mom can't feel it yet.

How I'm Changing: I'm starting to grow out of my yoga pants, because I'm pretty sensitive now to tight things.  I can feel the hardness and (I'll call it a baby bubble) moving upwards, instead of just being in my lower stomach.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I have to admit, this one is causing more grief and stress than it should. Luckily the scale is hidden.

Maternity Clothes: I should get me some of these.  My t-shirts are even getting short, so I love the longness of the two geeky maternity shirts Dad bought me.

How I'm Feeling: Most days I'm okay, but today I really feel completely wiped out.

Sleep: Decent. Some nights I get up to pee, but some I don't.  I had horrible VIVID  and scary dreams last night. Oh...maybe that's why I feel like crap today.

What I miss: feeling pretty. I got a hair cut I hate (it's just all wrong and only looks good curly), nothing I own fits, and I just feel frumpy.  I'm not even so obviously pregnant that I don't just look fat.

What I'm Eating: Most anything. I haven't really had food aversions or crazy cravings.

Cravings: Not really, but I'm loving root beer lately.

Best Moment this week: I wouldn't call it a 'best' moment, but I did go to the dentist this morning...
I will leave you with a picture of me in one of the pregnancy shirts that Aaron bought me...

Friday, July 26, 2013

14 week journal

How Far Along: 14 weeks, 5 days

Size of baby: Lemon (3.4in, 1.5 oz) I still claim this kid is a SMALL lemon.

Gender: I'm going for girl this week...

Movement:  none that I can feel

How I'm Changing: My belly is getting bigger/rounder/harder

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  ~15 (I'm not really sure what my 'starting' weight was, since I didn't know I was pregnant for a few weeks, and I was trying to lose weight prior to that.)

Maternity Clothes: I NEED SOME.  Baby, the clothing situation is getting desperate over here.

How I'm Feeling: Like the second trimester is GLORIOUS.

Sleep: much better, actually. I'm getting more used to sleeping with my pregnancy pillow, and I can now sleep walk to the bathroom, and pee without really waking up much.

What I miss: Leaning forward comfortably, jeans, energy to cook, clean, exercise.

What I'm Eating: Too much!

Cravings: I'm actually not really craving much right now.

Best Moment this week:

Friday, July 19, 2013

Baby Announcement

Hey baby,

Two posts in one day! I must be done with the first trimester! I even managed to clean a bathroom and not want to puke!

I put this on my other blog, but I hadn't posted it here yet. I <3 this baby announcement. We need to print it and send it out to family. We already put it in an email, but this thing is so cute..I adore it.  I was something like 4 weeks pregnant when we did the photo shoot, so I'm bigger now, but I still think Dad is beating me.

Why I didn't tell you

Dear baby,

I've been in their place--finding out that a friend is pregnant and feeling like I was the last person to know.  I understand the annoyance, and feeling left out. I do care about other people's feelings, and obviously didn't want to hurt them, but I had a lot of reasons for not telling more people about your impending arrival earlier.

I would claim that this list isn't exhaustive, but consult number 8 if you're still confused.

1. Fear of miscarriage. It took us FOREVER to get pregnant with you. The last thing that I wanted was to lose you and then have to grieve that, and tell people about it.
2. I wanted to tell my family, in person, before most people here, and that didn't happen until July.
3. I told people that I saw in person because I looked like death warmed over.
4. I don't lie to people, so if they asked if I was pregnant, I told them.
5. I told people I needed advice from at the time. Like...is this pain normal? Can I do this? etc. 6. Call me vain, but I really wanted to put out my baby announcement and tell people. Come on, what's the point of paying for an AWESOME baby announcement, and then telling everyone ahead of time? On that vein.
7. We were waiting for our 12 week ultrasound.
8. Because dammit, you're my baby and ultimately the decision is ours. If friends can't be supportive of that, then maybe they don't need to be in our lives.
9. BECAUSE THE FIRST TRIMESTER SUCKED and frankly I was missing all enthusiasm to tell anyone at that point. I felt like I had the flu for 3 months, and it took all my energy to wake the hell up, let alone making phone calls and send emails.     

 So if you're reading this and your feelings were hurt, I'm sorry, but I really hope that you help and support us through one of the most difficult and crazy times of our lives. Yeah, it's exciting, but it's also terrifying.


Week 13 journal

How Far Along: 13 weeks and 5 days

Size of baby: I started as a peach, and am almost to a lemon.  Umm...I think a lemon is smaller than a peach. Obviously these people don't eat good fruit. 
Size:2.9 inches, .81 oz.

Gender: I've gotten guesses for boys and girls

Movement: nope

How I'm Changing: my ribs and sides hurt, and almost feel crampy, especially when I'm driving.  Ligament pain is driving me nuts

Total Weight Gain/Loss: too damn much.

Maternity Clothes: Living in my maternity skirts, and shorts/sweats/yoga pants.

How I'm Feeling: Happy that the first trimester is almost over, and the chance of miscarriage is so much lower.

Sleep: Decent.  I find that all I have to do is close my eyes and I'm out. I fell asleep last night waiting for Dad to come to bed.  

What I miss: exercise without feeling like puking. Oh...feeling like puking but never puking....

What I'm Eating: Most anything. I over indulged on Indian food last night though.

Cravings: I was really craving samosas yesterday. So I got them. They were delicious.

Best Moment this week: We publicized our pregnancy.  Telling 500 people seemed to make it 'realer'

Sunday, July 14, 2013

You know what today is?

The last day of week 12, starting my last week of the first trimester!  Babycakes, we're on our way!  I dragged myself to Zumba this morning before I was really awake enough to know what I was doing.  I don't regret it, but man...I am so much slower now.  I can't jump (the 'girls' hate me), but at least I didn't want to puke the whole time.

Dad is sick, so I guess we're not taking you to the ball game today.  I'm not very sad about that, since it's so humid outside that my glasses fog up if I ever dare to BREATH.  I have a fundamental issue with this!

Urgh! I'm such a slacker. I need to our pregnancy announcement together.  And perhaps also call the lady who could make my house cleaner, since I obviously can't keep up right now.  Long list of things to do and I think I'll go back to bed.

Love ya babe,


p.s.  My Zumba teacher thinks that you either have Steven Tyler lips, or were sticking out your tongue. She also thinks you're a boy.  Time to start taking bets....

Friday, July 12, 2013

Week 8 Journal

This journal might pause for a week when I go to the midwife next week and get a due date, but it was explained to me that I should prefer a later due date, because I don't want to go so over that I can't have the baby at the birthing center I want to go to.  On that note, I'm switching doctor's to go to the local birthing center, so I can have the water birth I've always dreamed of.  If you like

How Far Along: Somewhere in the 8 week mark

Size of baby:  the size of a kidney bean or a raspberry! Your grandfather finds this hilarious.

Gender: Don't know yet!

Movement:  All I feel is grumbling intestines lol

How I'm Changing: My belly is getting bigger, and harder, and I have one pair of capri's that I can comfortably button. Actually, that's a lie. I don't button them, and just use the draw string to tie them closed.  I'm pretty sure I'm going to get a nice baby belly.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: truthfully...I'm not getting on a scale. It scares me.  To go from losing weight for so long, to gaining weight and being too tired to do anything...is pretty discouraging. I know I'm growing a person though, so I'll just stay off the scale.

Maternity Clothes: Tomorrow I'm planning on some skirt making with my friend Amy.  She's so talented, and will give me some skirts that will FIT!

How I'm Feeling: Pretty good. The nausea has kicked up a bit.  I'm still having the ligament soreness, and my lower back is getting stiff.  No heartburn, or puking. So I'm good with that!  Oh, still completely exhausted.

Sleep: What be dat?  Actually I've been getting up 1-2 times a night, and still having some issues sleeping well, but I can't complain.

What I miss: Let's see...healthy eating habits, clothing that fits, a desire to do ANYTHING, exercise that doesn't make me want to puke, and a real schedule.  Yeah, this trimester has played havoc on my schedule

What I'm Eating: Applesauce, pizza, peanut butter....whatever other people feed me. Seriously, I can eat most anything once. After that, I seem to be just done with it.  Stuff tastes awesome that first time though!


Best Moment this week:  Having my friend come out in a thunderstorm to bring me quiche.  That was just too sweet for words.  Also, letting my friends feel my tummy, pretty cool.

12 week journal

Hey baby,
You are so adorable!! We had an ultrasound this morning and you have some personality already! The first thing that you did was jump, which scared the crap out of your dad.  Then you proceeded to wave, suck your thumb, and recline like you were on the most comfortable chair possible (well I guess you are!) all while not letting the tech measure your neck.  The doctor said that you look healthy, and our due date of January 20th is right on. We get to find out if you're a boy or girl in 6 weeks!  I really can't believe how quickly this seems to be going.
You have lips...oh yes...pursing little lips, and a little nose and chin.  Since the last time we saw you, you looked like a shrimp, it was so shocking to see you fully formed and very...well, cute. We also found out that your heartbeat was 147.

How Far Along: 12 weeks 5 days!

Size of baby: Almost the size of a peach

Gender: Anyone's guess. You certainly weren't being cooperative during the ultrasound for them to see anything.

Movement: OMG you jump like someone startled you! It was so cool to watch!

How I'm Changing: My ribs started to hurt, and sides.  My belly is getting rounder and harder and the boobs...just need to stop hurting and growing. kthx.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: ~10lbs. I'm still scared of the scale.

Maternity Clothes: Living in my maternity skirts, and shorts/sweats/yoga pants.  My last pair of capris stopped fitting me...on vacation.  I tried on maternity pants but I HATED them.

How I'm Feeling: I'm on cloud nine after seeing you!

Sleep: I pee before I go to sleep, wake up once during the night, and when I wake up.  I'm sleeping pretty well lately.

What I miss: losing weight. Going the opposite direction WITHOUT the adorable pregnant belly (instead of just looking fatter) makes it hard on the self esteem.

What I'm Eating: Most anything. I need to up the veggies though, and down the salt.

Cravings: I did have a spinach salad the other day with fries, and as I'm eating these fries as they're the most amazing thing in the world, dad is laughing at me.  I have to admit, I'm craving a milkshake. I want dairy, and could probably use the calcium but the trade off of being really sick isn't worth it.

Best Moment this week: I'm not sure anything will beat the ultrasound...it was so amazing! 

Since you were kind enough to read this far, here are some pictures!!!

This is a profile shot. Look at those lips!!

Here baby you decided to suck your thumb...on camera.  So cute.  

This was a zoomed out picture of the whole baby that the doctor gave us.  
It was so incredibly amazing to see you.  


p.s. We need to get Dad in here writing to you!!

Monday, July 1, 2013

11 week journal

Hey baby!
We had a wonderful visit to the midwife last week. I really liked the practice, and dad felt comfortable there too.  Instead of having to come every month, it's every 6 weeks, which is fine by me.  You are already expressing yourself by refusing to let us hear your heartbeat with the dopplar.  We'll see you when we get back from Maine though, and go for an ultrasound.  The midwife confirmed the due date, so you are due on January 20th.  Please be punctual, unlike your father.  If you were to inherit my slight OCD when it comes to being on-time/15 minutes early, I wouldn't complain.


How Far Along
: 11 weeks baby. 2 more weeks in this trimester!

Size of baby: You're the size of a lime!

Gender: I think I should start taking bets...

Movement:  I know you're moving in there, but we won't feel it for a couple of months.  

How I'm Changing: My belly is getting rounder and rounder daily, it seems like.  

Total Weight Gain/Loss: ~10lbs. I'm scared of the scale.  

Maternity Clothes: maternity skirts and sweats all the way baby! 

How I'm Feeling: I'm actually feeling pretty good right now.  

Sleep: I'm sleeping pretty well, but my back is sore.  

What I miss: Motivation to exercise, and lunch meat.  

What I'm Eating:  I ate most of a lemon tart yesterday.  I think I could do that again today...

Cravings: I misheard dad last night and thought he said something about waffles, and I've been craving them since.  I don't think I'm getting any waffles though.